Change Your Mindset and Your Life (when you stop relying on these)! I Promise!

 Hi, I'm Pamela J

Before we dive into the details, let me introduce myself. I'm Pamela J, your host of THE REBUILD, a blog and podcast to help you design, create, and live a freedom-filled life.  In 2015 I lost everything (a husband, two house, and a business). I was destitute and begged God to partner with me as my Chairman of the Board. He agreed and together we dug out of my hopeless hole to a hope-filled life. I then committed to teaching others to do the same. I've paid off $25k of debt, invested in rental income properties, and I'm now dedicating myself to sharing these insights with you. Remember, success leaves clues, and I'm here to help you take advantage of every single one.

The Age of Feelings

Let's face it, often when responding to something or someone we don't like, our feelings often take the lead instead of facts. But what defines a fact? A fact is something known or proved true. In contrast, feelings are emotional states or reactions that can be vague or irrational. It's essential to discern whether you're acting on a fact or a feeling.

Discernment, or the ability to judge well, is crucial. Often, our immediate reactions stem from emotions rather than facts. Being aware of this distinction allows us to respond thoughtfully, not just emotionally. In the Christian context, discernment means obtaining spiritual guidance without judgment.

Deception—the act of deceiving—is another factor we must consider. We can express false emotions through facial expressions, leading to deception. Therefore, it's vital to apply facts and discernment in our interactions.

The Evolution of Communication

Does the phrase "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" sound familiar? During the 90s, societal changes shifted our responses to perceived slights, labeling those who didn’t always say nice things as bullies. Suddenly, language turned into an exercise in walking on eggshells, and standing up for oneself became vilified.

This shift has weakened society, creating a culture of sensitivity and victimization. The rise in lawsuits and harassment training catered more to those easily offended rather than fostering resilience.

Addressing the Modern Therapy Mindset

Modern therapy's focus on individual feelings has contributed to this culture of fragility. By emphasizing personal peace above all else, we've inadvertently promoted selfishness, labeling anything disagreeable as "toxic," "traumatic," or "abusive." We've diluted the true meaning of these words, leaving those genuinely in need struggling to be heard.

Rediscovering Resilience (and Fun)

So, how do we move forward? Let's step back, apply truth, and reject perpetual offense. Cultivate thick skin to navigate conflicts and embrace truth, which isn't always nice but is always kind. Unity lies in resilience, not fragility.

Lastly, let's reintroduce fun into our lives. Embrace thick skin, enjoy banter, and stop personalizing every uncomfortable interaction as personal offense. Find joy in your imperfections and laugh at yourself. Avoid creating unnecessary barriers by labeling everything as pain, trauma, toxic, or abuse.

Next Steps

To truly transform, watch for the release of each mindset episode in this 4-part series.

If you find value in this post, please subscribe to my YouTube Channel and Community where we connect and hold one another accountable to our goals weekly.

Until next time, stay strong, stay tough, and keep that thick skin on.

Peace, 

xo, PJ